So, i was listening to the Adam Carola show (great stoof, for you roseville-ians, it's on 106.5 every morning), and they were talking about Danny Bonaduce's love life. His wife want's to divorce him. He had overcome his drug addiction (i think it was alcoholism, but don't hold me to that), but i guess something broke loose since then and his wife simply doesn't want to stay together. They plan on being friends still, and they have children whom Bonaduce'll be free to visit just about whenever he'd like; it all sounds good.
Anyways, back on topic: this morning he was talking about a strawberry-blonde he'd met the night before. They hit it off pretty well, and she asked him to give her a ride back to her place; even offered to let him in. Now, i don't know exactly how far it went, but it got to the point that he could stay the night; but he didn't want to. He felt as if doing so would mean he'd given up on getting together again with his wife; whom he professes to love, profusely. Now, get this: it's not cheating on his wife that stopped him; he didn't go through with it because he genuinely believed he could care for this woman, and he felt sleeping with a women he felt he could develop a relationship with, would be cheating on his wife. He does sleep with women, has since he's been married too; but that wasn't an issue in most cases, because he didn't care for them; it was "casual" sex, without any emotional attatchment for him.
Now, even though i don't agree with his casual sex statement; i have a lot of respect for his reason to back-off from the woman the night before. It's a quality i feel is very important in relationships: devotion. If you care for a person, and commit to them: it's your responsibility to not let yourself become too attatched to someone else you could potentially become attatched to. Nobody is perfect, no relationship is lacking of any bumps in the road; it's up to each individual to know when to back off of a possible friendship+, or to lay down the rules with friends who may be a bit overly friendly or have intentions you can't go along with.
It's not fair for a partner to restrict their loves' relationships to only people of the same gender; and in today's world, it's allowed less and less in relationships. You aren't "strong and dominant" these days, you're over-protective, and very few find that "Cute"; it's normally a pain in the butt. That's also why it's important to be cautious when choosing your potential spouse/groom; you need to know you trust them and their devotion to you. And you need to be sure you're honest to them.
Random Add In (RAI):
Lately the people i've been interested have been into giving me this list of "warnings"; which i dunno if this is a new thing coming into phase, if i've just gotten two people in common that way, or if I'm out of touch with the "Californian" way; but i think it's unneeded in almost all regards. I do believe it's important however, to solidify each others' opinions of what qualifies as "Cheating" in the relationship, and what is a "must share" with your partner. Threats for "If you do..." type, probably aren't the best (consider if you scare them into keeping it a secret and it pushes them away); but i'm sure each couple will find their balance with that. What i wanted to say though, is that it sucks! Let us find out about each other on our own, don't give "warnings"; it's like you're trying to scare them away! If you start dating somebody, you should know them somewhat already, and you should expect a few surprises along the road that you didn't see coming. Suck it up! That's what relationships are all about: discovering each other. And trust me, you aren't who you think you are. I get re-illuminated about who i am, with each new person i find. In retrospect on each day of my life, different people bring out new sides to me, and more sides that need refinement often times.
Anyways, back on topic: this morning he was talking about a strawberry-blonde he'd met the night before. They hit it off pretty well, and she asked him to give her a ride back to her place; even offered to let him in. Now, i don't know exactly how far it went, but it got to the point that he could stay the night; but he didn't want to. He felt as if doing so would mean he'd given up on getting together again with his wife; whom he professes to love, profusely. Now, get this: it's not cheating on his wife that stopped him; he didn't go through with it because he genuinely believed he could care for this woman, and he felt sleeping with a women he felt he could develop a relationship with, would be cheating on his wife. He does sleep with women, has since he's been married too; but that wasn't an issue in most cases, because he didn't care for them; it was "casual" sex, without any emotional attatchment for him.
Now, even though i don't agree with his casual sex statement; i have a lot of respect for his reason to back-off from the woman the night before. It's a quality i feel is very important in relationships: devotion. If you care for a person, and commit to them: it's your responsibility to not let yourself become too attatched to someone else you could potentially become attatched to. Nobody is perfect, no relationship is lacking of any bumps in the road; it's up to each individual to know when to back off of a possible friendship+, or to lay down the rules with friends who may be a bit overly friendly or have intentions you can't go along with.
It's not fair for a partner to restrict their loves' relationships to only people of the same gender; and in today's world, it's allowed less and less in relationships. You aren't "strong and dominant" these days, you're over-protective, and very few find that "Cute"; it's normally a pain in the butt. That's also why it's important to be cautious when choosing your potential spouse/groom; you need to know you trust them and their devotion to you. And you need to be sure you're honest to them.
Random Add In (RAI):
Lately the people i've been interested have been into giving me this list of "warnings"; which i dunno if this is a new thing coming into phase, if i've just gotten two people in common that way, or if I'm out of touch with the "Californian" way; but i think it's unneeded in almost all regards. I do believe it's important however, to solidify each others' opinions of what qualifies as "Cheating" in the relationship, and what is a "must share" with your partner. Threats for "If you do..." type, probably aren't the best (consider if you scare them into keeping it a secret and it pushes them away); but i'm sure each couple will find their balance with that. What i wanted to say though, is that it sucks! Let us find out about each other on our own, don't give "warnings"; it's like you're trying to scare them away! If you start dating somebody, you should know them somewhat already, and you should expect a few surprises along the road that you didn't see coming. Suck it up! That's what relationships are all about: discovering each other. And trust me, you aren't who you think you are. I get re-illuminated about who i am, with each new person i find. In retrospect on each day of my life, different people bring out new sides to me, and more sides that need refinement often times.
